Freddy Fairhead funeral: 31 August 2010

Dr Freddy Fairhead died in the evening of the 24th August 2010, in his sleep, peacefully, after a year-long battle with cancer. He was 81, and hugely active right up until his final illness. He remained cheerful and daftly funny to the very end. His funeral was held at the Père Lachaise crematorium in Paris, on the 31st August. There were tears, but there was also laughter, particularly when his coffin was wheeled away to the tune of "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life", from Monty Python's "Life of Brian". Which all of us knew he would have enjoyed. Such was the man.

His lady Françoise gave a superb eulogy which is shown here in the original French, and in English.


Pour le Docteur Frederick Walter FAIRHEAD

Frederick, Freddy pour ses amis, nous a quittés et c'est un jour de deuil pour nous tous. Jusqu'à hier j'ai pensé que je ne trouverais pas la force de parler mais il partageait avec moi l'amour des mots, de la langue et m'aurait encouragée comme il l'a toujours fait. Comme l'a dit sa petite-fille Joséphine « Granddad's funeral needs to be a celebration of his life, and not a mourning of his death ».

Célébrer sa vie c'est bien sûr rappeler un parcours assez impressionnant dont il était fier à juste titre et qui le laissait toujours un peu étonné. Le « vice-Président of medical affairs Squibb Europe » aimait à rappeler son enfance cockney des bords de la Tamise. Et ce n'était pas la réussite sociale que l'on remarquait en premier chez lui mais plutôt sa simplicité et sa bienveillance à l'égard de chacun.

Célébrer sa vie c'est aussi évoquer son amour de la musique, son érudition dans ce domaine, et sa passion pour l'opéra qui n'était pas qu'intellectuelle : Frederick pleurait la mort de Mimi dans la Bohême et se laissait emporter par les Walkyries avec la même exaltation lorsqu'il écoutait la énième version du Ring qu'il venait d'acheter.

On ne pouvait qu'être frappé par son intelligence, sa culture qui ne connaissait pas de frontières : la science, la médecine continuaient à l'émerveiller mais il adorait aussi la poésie et la littérature; il lisait Cavafy en grec, Lorca en Espagnol et Proust ou Maupassant en français, et ne pouvait vivre sans livres.

Plus que ses connaissances ce sont peut-être ses qualités humaines qui finalement marquaient tous ceux qu'il rencontrait : sa gentillesse ou plutôt sa bonté, sa générosité inlassable, sa fidélité, son sens de l'humour -anglais- lui avaient assuré d'indéfectibles amitiés.

Mais la caractéristique la plus marquante de Frederick était probablement qu'il était doué pour le bonheur ; sa vie n'avait pas été exempte de tragédies mais il savait être heureux. Il adorait la gastronomie, aimait cuisiner pour ceux qu'il chérissait, profitait intensément et avec jubilation de tous les plaisirs de la vie. C'est ce qu'il essayait d'enseigner à ses petits-enfants en se réjouissant de leur fabriquer d'heureux souvenirs d'enfance dans son paradis du Boulou...

Pour ses funérailles il disait qu'il ne voulait pas de tristesse, même s'il savait qu'il y aurait quelques larmes tout de même, mais plutôt que l'on boive à sa mémoire en se souvenant de sa façon de vivre : CARPE DIEM...

I used to tell him that he was « the Man of my life » ; for everybody he was « A Great Man ».


For Dr Frederick Walter FAIRHEAD

Frederick, Freddy to his friends, has left us and it's a day of mourning for us all. Up until yesterday I had thought that I wouldn't find the strength to talk here today, but he shared with me a love of words, of language, and he would have encouraged me as he always did. As his granddaughter Josephine said: "Granddad's funeral needs to be a celebration of his life, and not a mourning of his death".

To celebrate his life is of course to remember a somewhat impressive career, of which he was justifiably proud, and which always left him a bit stunned. The "Vice-President of medical affairs Squibb Europe" loved to remember his Cockney childhood on the banks of the Thames. And it wasn't social success that one noticed first about him, so much as his straightforwardness and his benevolence towards everyone.

To celebrate his life is also to remember his love of music, his erudition in this field, and his passion for opera which was not just intellectual: Frederick cried over the death of Mimi in "la Bohême" and let himself be carried away by the Valkyries with the same exaltation when he listened to the Nth version of the Ring which he'd just bought.

It was impossible not to be struck by his intelligence, his culture which knew no borders: science, medicine continued to fill him with wonder, but he also loved poetry and literature. He read Cavafy in Greek, Lorca in Spanish, and Proust or Maupassant in French, and simply could not live without books.

More than his vast knowledge it was perhaps his human qualities which in the end struck all those he met: his kindness, or rather his goodness, his indefatigable generosity, his loyalty, his English sense of humour, all assured him unwavering friendships.

But Frederick's most defining quality was probably that he was gifted for happiness; his life was not without tragedy, but he knew how to be happy. He adored gastronomy, he loved to cook for those he cherished, profiting intensely and with jubilation of all the pleasures in life. It's what he tried to teach his grandchildren while rejoicing in giving them happy childhood memories in his paradise at Le Boulou...

For his funeral he used to say that he didn't want sadness, even though he knew there'd be some tears all the same; but rather that we should drink to his memory while recalling his way of life: CARPE DIEM...

I used to tell him that he was the man of my life; for everybody, he was a great man.


Poems

Music